Hey there. Nice to see you again! Wow, you look great! You're getting in shape! It must be all that exercise! Did you get a hair cut? You look ugly. I preferred the old hair cut.
Well, now that we've broken the ice from our long sojourn, let us rekindle our relationship. I can tell you more longwinded stories, and you can nod your head, half paying attention while I ramble.
I went home for the holidays. It was nice. It was good to see the family and friends. Christmas was good. It was a relaxing, but rushed time. 10 days isn't much time. And I flew at least business class both ways, which was hecka nice. I should say that coming back to Japan was in some ways harder than leaving in the first place. I was moving into a new apartment. I had gotten back into a GOC rhythm. There was no new job or anything terribly new to look forward to. So I came back, and it was a little bit bittersweet.
I lug my heavy suitcase on a 2-3 hour train trek to my ew apartment. The girl who I'm living with -- M --was surprising short, ie no long winded intros. This is fine, and the communal space is spare so its not like there is anywhere to chat, but it was still weird to be like, "oh, you're moving in now. hi nice to see you. this is how much rent is. when do you want to practice english and japanese together? im having friends over tonight does that bother you? ok bye." whatevs. i dont care.
I won't go too deep into it this post, but she is extremely neat and demanding about neatness, I think to an unreasonable extent, and that causes me stress. I know I'm messy, but I think things such as leaving the sponge in the sink, and not leaving the proper bathroom doors open and closed is stupid to keep complaining about. Just close the door, put the sponge where it should be, and call it a day. Moreover, there is no table in the kitchen, though there used to be when I looked here in December, so that bothers me, gonna have to talk about that. She's out a lot, so I have privacy, which is nice.
I got back on the 30th and on the 31st was what we like to call "the new year." We had a whole gang celebrating. Me and old roomie J. J's Nova comrade and this comrade's visiting English friend. My friend N and her visiting English friend. Also, there was another English person there. We GOCers were greatly outnumbered. It felt like the war of 1812 all over again. (Which we won.) But I think everybody won on New Years.
We go over to J's apt. We shoot the breeze and play pass the computer so I can put on music I like. That's always a fun game. We started getting sloppy with canned G&T's, screwdrivers, and man-sodas (beer,) for this young crowd (i.e. no geezers.) Then we played drinking card games. This was a lot of fun. In Japan, you don't often get to go over to someone's apartment and just let loose. A lot of people go out to bars or clubs, (and often leave early to catch last train home.) But the whole, let's go over to so-and-so's apartment just isn't done too much in this country, so it was a refreshing change of pace. That is why I was marginally bummed when we decided to go to Yokohama, but that is what the people wanted.
On New Year's Eve the trains are open all night -- so that people can go to temples any time they want. We get on the train, are on it for midnight fireworks in Yokohama, and at midnight J's friend pops open a bottle of bubbly. We pass it around like the gaikokujin we are, (don't worry, drinking in public is allowed here.) I had a good time on that train, actually. Not sure about everyone else, it took over 90 minutes.
We get to Yokohama and go to the amusement park. We wait in line for about an hour. This wasn't hecka fun. There were two French dude-bro's in front of us who were not a fun time. We ride the rollercoaster and it was amazing
ly unspectacular. Next we go to a shopping mall for some reason and wander around wishing everyone a happy new year in Japanese, essentially saying, I think, "good morning and good luck" (trans. from Edward. R. Murrows). Then some people get tired, some people get club urgings, (but didn't go clubbing) and everyone pretty much splits up. I was bummed that they called it a night, but what are u gonna do. I went part of the way home with some people, (not everybody, N lives near Yokohama, for example.) And then took the very long train journey home.
I didn't get to sleep until daylight, which was probably good for my jet lag. I had messed up sleep cycle until about two days ago. I think what kicked it into normal gear was work yesterday. I have to leave here at 6.47, so I gotta get up at 5.30. Getting up this early, I actually went to bed at 10.30 last night and slept aight! I can't believe I got a good nights sleep going to bed that early. And then I woke up at 5.30 no problem. I think I am turning into an old man. I have also been strong and resisting the urge to nap. btw: work is the same, only add 1 hour to the commute each way. But i dont care too much bout that.
The town I'm in is cool. Higashi omiya. I want to go explore it more. It's a small town alright, but it's got a club! What the heck is there a club doing in this small town? (it's expensive to get in, so it's not on the list of my things to do, but it is nestled between a 24 hour fast japanese food joint and a mom and pop cheap foods store.) there is also a bar about two buildings away that seemed kind of lively on New year's day, but havent ventured there too yet. Too cheap/broke. I'm not an alcoholic, really, but there is limited public space in Japan, and as I said, people don't go over to each other's places.
One more interesting thing. On Sunday, I woke up at about 7 am, with my messed up skedul. So I decided to go to church. I can see the Church from my window, its lit across the street, but also across the tracks, so what would be a 30 second walk is more like a 3 min walk. I sneak in, cuz I'm a little bit late, and listen to the priest talk alot. No reciting prayers in the first part, just listening to the preist, I think reading from and talking about scripture. Some usher was nice enough to get me a hymnal and an order of worship. Eventually the priest's monologue ends and people sing a song or two, a couple prayers, and communion starts. I sang along to the hymns tho they were written in Japanese. Brrra! Brrra! The lady next to me encouraged and helped me to fill out a visitor's card. I wrote my name. And she handed it in. Communion came to us. First a peice of spongy bread was brought on trays to everyone. And then grape juice in small individual glass shooters was brought to everyone on a special tray. I ate and drank when everyone else did. I didn't recite the prayer though, because I wasn't exactly sure what I was praying. After this was the announcements, at the end now, before the final hymn. Some people stood up, said some things. Priest said some stuff, some lady stood up, bowed, people clapped. Then the priest read my card and I stood up, bowed, and they clapped! It was crazy.
After church the lady who was sitting next to me dropped me off with this nice man who spoke English. Turns out this church is basically the umbrella Protestant church of Japan founded after WWII. We talk for about 5 minutes in the pews, and then we go I think to leave. I bow to the minister and want to go right to leave the church, but the minister directs me left to coffee hour, saying "doozo" (please.) OK...
So I go to Coffee hour, and it probably lasted almost and hour for me. I small talked with that guy, very nice. Some other people spoke English. I talked to them a little. They were all very nice and directed me to sit down at this table, which I did. I had all the snacks and tea they offered me. It was very warm and hospitable. Apparently, after Church, since some people are interested in learning English, they have the day's translated scripture and go over it in English. I didn't do that this time, but maybe sometime I will help them. As I was indicating that I was going to leave soon, and also when certain people were leaving, people said, "yeah, so, see you next week." Note the period. So apparently I am in this church now, which is I think is essentially the Japanese version of the church I was in in the GOC. As someone told J, who told me -- "Once you're in a Japanese club, you're in it for life." But that's cool. It should be a good way to get involved in the community and maybe practice Japanese.
That's all he wrote for today. Gotta go! Bai Bai!
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Just the Two of Us
From the first time the internet placed you in my sight
I knew that we should talk before we both said alright.
Although questions arose in my mind would I be man enough
Against dirt choose clean and be standin up?
From the bedroom that first night
Sleeping light wondering -- will we be alright?
People talking all loud didnt get me upset
But what did was when i didnt have internet.
The next day I don't think one bit I sent,
While you mailed me texts about the bathroom vent.
I try to live cleanly -- but I'm afraid of this --
Your impatience when I let the sponge lay in the sink.
Then to my knees and I begged the law please
Let me be a good tenant all she needs.
Deposit, utilities, and cleaning fees too
I pledge my rent to you.
Just the two of us, we can make if we try
Just the two of us.
Just the two of us, building castles in the sky
Just the two of us, you and I.
I knew that we should talk before we both said alright.
Although questions arose in my mind would I be man enough
Against dirt choose clean and be standin up?
From the bedroom that first night
Sleeping light wondering -- will we be alright?
People talking all loud didnt get me upset
But what did was when i didnt have internet.
The next day I don't think one bit I sent,
While you mailed me texts about the bathroom vent.
I try to live cleanly -- but I'm afraid of this --
Your impatience when I let the sponge lay in the sink.
Then to my knees and I begged the law please
Let me be a good tenant all she needs.
Deposit, utilities, and cleaning fees too
I pledge my rent to you.
Just the two of us, we can make if we try
Just the two of us.
Just the two of us, building castles in the sky
Just the two of us, you and I.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
End of Part 1
I like to think our lives have plots. Each portion of your life -- divide it up along whatever lines you want -- segues into the next, like a beautiful piece of literature.
Anyways, as I told my roomate J, this is the end of part 1 of our Japanese adventure, which, if one considers Japan takin up a chapter or 2 in my life story, is a good few paragraphs gone in my autobiography. But in the smaller scale, going back to The GOC, moving into a new appartment, the dissolution of our previous roomate trio -- signifies a definate seachange.
I'm sitting in the Business Class waiting lounge for American Airlines -- we call it The Admirals Lounge. And bless their hearts they have internet, but their internet connection will not even allow me to visit www.urbandictionary.com to look up the meaning of "seachange." "Category: Tasteless." ... :(
Anyways, if The Admirals Lounge is any indication, business class is the Only way to travel. There is a buffet of sushi, cheese and crackers, and, to anyone English who used to live with me out there -- meat pies! There is also Benjamine Franklin's favorite drink on tap, along with whatever other alcohol you want. It's pretty rediculous. The chairs are hecka stylish and comfortable. It almost makes you wonder why they don't make the rest of the airport comfortable... almost.
Not just in the Admirals Lounge, but anywhere, Japan is truly a great country if you want to be catered to. To the finest detail service is of the utmost quality here. They will take your trash with a smile, go out of their way to help you locate a rival business, sneak you train tickets... the list continues.
So, I don't feel like waxing nostalgic or summarizing the events so far. Saying that there is a sea change is enough. One thing I will say, is that now I know I am definately here for more than one year. And as I think about my proposed time-line -- get a job teaching in a school in April, anywhere -- maybe the boondocks to learn the lanuage; work there for a year till the contract is up; moving out to Kobe to strike it rich for 6 months -- it all seems pretty rushed. We shall see what happens.
Stay tuned for Chapter 2, faithful readers!
Anyways, as I told my roomate J, this is the end of part 1 of our Japanese adventure, which, if one considers Japan takin up a chapter or 2 in my life story, is a good few paragraphs gone in my autobiography. But in the smaller scale, going back to The GOC, moving into a new appartment, the dissolution of our previous roomate trio -- signifies a definate seachange.
I'm sitting in the Business Class waiting lounge for American Airlines -- we call it The Admirals Lounge. And bless their hearts they have internet, but their internet connection will not even allow me to visit www.urbandictionary.com to look up the meaning of "seachange." "Category: Tasteless." ... :(
Anyways, if The Admirals Lounge is any indication, business class is the Only way to travel. There is a buffet of sushi, cheese and crackers, and, to anyone English who used to live with me out there -- meat pies! There is also Benjamine Franklin's favorite drink on tap, along with whatever other alcohol you want. It's pretty rediculous. The chairs are hecka stylish and comfortable. It almost makes you wonder why they don't make the rest of the airport comfortable... almost.
Not just in the Admirals Lounge, but anywhere, Japan is truly a great country if you want to be catered to. To the finest detail service is of the utmost quality here. They will take your trash with a smile, go out of their way to help you locate a rival business, sneak you train tickets... the list continues.
So, I don't feel like waxing nostalgic or summarizing the events so far. Saying that there is a sea change is enough. One thing I will say, is that now I know I am definately here for more than one year. And as I think about my proposed time-line -- get a job teaching in a school in April, anywhere -- maybe the boondocks to learn the lanuage; work there for a year till the contract is up; moving out to Kobe to strike it rich for 6 months -- it all seems pretty rushed. We shall see what happens.
Stay tuned for Chapter 2, faithful readers!
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Sunset in Japan
So today is Tuesday, not Monday, but I am still posting, because yesterday I didn't. My tinnitus has gotten better. I am not entirely sure if it has subsided or if I don't notice it as much. I think its a combination of both. For starters, I don't really hear it too much, unless I pay attention to it, and then it is still marginal. I hear it when going to bed in the silence. The ringing in my left ear is much less there if at all. I think the pitch has gotten even higher in tone, almost so high as to be a whisper. But, when I pray and hope that it is gone, I go to bed or a quiet room and hear a wringing in my right ear. Its not too bad, probably could live with it, but would I want to with probably more than half a century left to go? I also think that I am becoming accustomed to it. They did a study, put people in a dead silent room and found most people heard a high pitched tone. But I do think that what I have is louder and more unnatural than that. The outlook is not as grim as last week, when the tinnitus was worse, but, I am still fearful that I have this condition. I am also very afraid that I may damage my ears again, hear too loud a noise or get an infection or whatever. With my ears already like this, if they got knocked back again, so that I got BAD tinnitus -- well, that would be beyond horrible. As such, I have been refraining from consuming alcohol and caffeine (except in chocolate form I'm so bad,) because I hear (no pun intended) that makes your condition temporarily worse. So that is the story with my ears. I'm sure most of you don't care, I'll move on.
I turned 22 on Saturday. I am officially over the hill. 21 is when you become an adult. 22 is when you become over the hill. You see, 20 is the age before you can become publicly intoxicated -- which, as we all know, is a sign of one's maturity. So when you are 20 you are a kid. And then 21 you are an adult because you can drink and buy minors rated R movie tickets. And then 22, when nothing special happens, you are over the hill. The only thing I have left to look forward to is when I turn 25, the age you at which you can rent a car from Thrifty ... without a daily surcharge. So I can even rent a car now, just with a daily surcharge! And that's old hat! By the way, the legal drinking age in Japan is 20, which is probably why Japan is full of old people. Yes, turning 22 sure did make me wonder where the years went...
I went to the bowling alley with The Last Roomate J. We played epic ping pong matches. As everyone knows, I am a backhand looper. My forehand game is practically non-existant. I found a new grip that lets me hit pretty good forehands, with the correct timing, and was developing that. Then P stopped by. We bowled a couple games. Then P invited us back to his studio to play some videogames. He lives with his gf. We hang out in his apartment for a little bit. Then his gf turns off the lights, and she and P emerge from the kitchen with a home made birthday cake... with candles! It was incredibly nice of them, and I wasn't expecting it at all! We talked for an hour or so, and me and J left to our apartment. By the way. P has a Wii and he has Mario Galaxies. Very cool.
I have been continuing to work at the tax college. I have a job interview for a high school or junior high position on Thursday. Wish me luck. I am also moving out of the apartment.
Looking on various apartment boards, I found an apartment posted by this 20 year old Japanese girl who works at an office. She lives with a 45 year old man "who has good sense." I thought they shared the apartment, but he owns it. Last night I went to check out the place. I travel about 2 hours to this place. It's in The Middle of Nowhere, Suburbs, Japan. Its an hour from Tokyo. 90 minutes -- 2 hours from my part time tax college job. I get to this place, after a few confused txt messages on both our parts from me and the girl. She arrives on a motorcycle and asks if I can ride on it with her. I figure refusing is wussy, and people might generally not want wusses for their apt mates. So she gives me a helmut and I get on the back. First time I ever rode on a motorcycle, only 5 minutes, and I have to say it was fun. We get to her apartment, and before we walk in, she explain the old man living there is the owner and she's been there 3 months. And here I was hoping he was some sketchy old noob.
Wow, this guy kept this place so clean he would give Danny Tanner a run for his money. I bet he even dusted! It was a small little place, 3 bedroom, a kitchen attached to a dining room, attached to a computer room. The place was a little spare, the single thing in the computer room was the computer. The man seemed a little incredulous and laughed a little impolitely at my desire to live there. The girl was our translator. They questioned my working 90 - 120 minutes away, although I don't think my commute concerns them. The man also seemed suspicious of living with someone who doesn't really speak Japanese. I speak a little, but not nearly conversational. My mind was running a mile a minute trying to figure out what they were saying, though, so I think living in Danny Tanner Heck-zone would be very beneficial to my language skills. BuT CAn TheY HaNDle mE?!! So, they said they would take till the weekend to think about it. I also don't know if they know that there's a good chance I'd move in April. Think I should tell them? Everyone is hecka polite in Japan, so much so that you don't want to go around screwing everyone for your own benefit like you would in The G.O.C..
So, realizing the tentativeness of this new place, I have spent today applying to new apts. Applied to a bunch. Gonna go look at 2 on Thursday. I think these are shared apts, 5-6 people, no owner-dood living on site. This is sort of what I want, minus any English people. But there are def Japanese at both, so language potential does exist. There is also a Spanish guy at one, so it would be fun para hablar en espanol al ello. Not as much as at Danny Tanner's house, though. Danny Tanner's house also costs $250 dollars, and this other one costs about $560 I think. $250 is redic cheap tho, $560 is a fairly good deal here.
Given the option of living at Danny Tanner's house, a 2 hour commute from my 2-time a week, 9.00 am start job, what do you guys think I should do? Advice?
I am coming home for Christmas.
____________________________________
We are on the final pages of the first chapter of Japan. I should have blog posted about this in more detail, but forgot to -- my roommate M moved out last Thursday to England. It's too bad. I'll miss talking about anime and watching him play computer games. And today J came home with exciting news -- he got offered a job. He starts training tomorrow. The next day they will fly him to the opposite coast of Japan for his job. He is a super-sub, meaning he fills in for English high-school teachers on long term basis. If a teacher is needed for a week or a month anywhere in Japan, he is your man. They will pay for his accomadation, wherever. So he will be living as a vagabond for a year. Kind of a cool gig, not my cup of tea, because I want roots. But in any case, he'll probably be gone in 2 days, and then I am left here, alone, in the squalor. But only for a week, and then I am gone to The Good Ol' Country. When I return, I will be somewhere new.
Yes, this first part of Japan was easy. It was too easy, and I didn't try hard. The wheels of fate are turning in synchrony with the eternal clock. Things are moving; people are moving. I am moving; I hope I don't stop until I've learned Japanese.
--Eoin
I turned 22 on Saturday. I am officially over the hill. 21 is when you become an adult. 22 is when you become over the hill. You see, 20 is the age before you can become publicly intoxicated -- which, as we all know, is a sign of one's maturity. So when you are 20 you are a kid. And then 21 you are an adult because you can drink and buy minors rated R movie tickets. And then 22, when nothing special happens, you are over the hill. The only thing I have left to look forward to is when I turn 25, the age you at which you can rent a car from Thrifty ... without a daily surcharge. So I can even rent a car now, just with a daily surcharge! And that's old hat! By the way, the legal drinking age in Japan is 20, which is probably why Japan is full of old people. Yes, turning 22 sure did make me wonder where the years went...
I went to the bowling alley with The Last Roomate J. We played epic ping pong matches. As everyone knows, I am a backhand looper. My forehand game is practically non-existant. I found a new grip that lets me hit pretty good forehands, with the correct timing, and was developing that. Then P stopped by. We bowled a couple games. Then P invited us back to his studio to play some videogames. He lives with his gf. We hang out in his apartment for a little bit. Then his gf turns off the lights, and she and P emerge from the kitchen with a home made birthday cake... with candles! It was incredibly nice of them, and I wasn't expecting it at all! We talked for an hour or so, and me and J left to our apartment. By the way. P has a Wii and he has Mario Galaxies. Very cool.
I have been continuing to work at the tax college. I have a job interview for a high school or junior high position on Thursday. Wish me luck. I am also moving out of the apartment.
Looking on various apartment boards, I found an apartment posted by this 20 year old Japanese girl who works at an office. She lives with a 45 year old man "who has good sense." I thought they shared the apartment, but he owns it. Last night I went to check out the place. I travel about 2 hours to this place. It's in The Middle of Nowhere, Suburbs, Japan. Its an hour from Tokyo. 90 minutes -- 2 hours from my part time tax college job. I get to this place, after a few confused txt messages on both our parts from me and the girl. She arrives on a motorcycle and asks if I can ride on it with her. I figure refusing is wussy, and people might generally not want wusses for their apt mates. So she gives me a helmut and I get on the back. First time I ever rode on a motorcycle, only 5 minutes, and I have to say it was fun. We get to her apartment, and before we walk in, she explain the old man living there is the owner and she's been there 3 months. And here I was hoping he was some sketchy old noob.
Wow, this guy kept this place so clean he would give Danny Tanner a run for his money. I bet he even dusted! It was a small little place, 3 bedroom, a kitchen attached to a dining room, attached to a computer room. The place was a little spare, the single thing in the computer room was the computer. The man seemed a little incredulous and laughed a little impolitely at my desire to live there. The girl was our translator. They questioned my working 90 - 120 minutes away, although I don't think my commute concerns them. The man also seemed suspicious of living with someone who doesn't really speak Japanese. I speak a little, but not nearly conversational. My mind was running a mile a minute trying to figure out what they were saying, though, so I think living in Danny Tanner Heck-zone would be very beneficial to my language skills. BuT CAn TheY HaNDle mE?!! So, they said they would take till the weekend to think about it. I also don't know if they know that there's a good chance I'd move in April. Think I should tell them? Everyone is hecka polite in Japan, so much so that you don't want to go around screwing everyone for your own benefit like you would in The G.O.C..
So, realizing the tentativeness of this new place, I have spent today applying to new apts. Applied to a bunch. Gonna go look at 2 on Thursday. I think these are shared apts, 5-6 people, no owner-dood living on site. This is sort of what I want, minus any English people. But there are def Japanese at both, so language potential does exist. There is also a Spanish guy at one, so it would be fun para hablar en espanol al ello. Not as much as at Danny Tanner's house, though. Danny Tanner's house also costs $250 dollars, and this other one costs about $560 I think. $250 is redic cheap tho, $560 is a fairly good deal here.
Given the option of living at Danny Tanner's house, a 2 hour commute from my 2-time a week, 9.00 am start job, what do you guys think I should do? Advice?
I am coming home for Christmas.
____________________________________
We are on the final pages of the first chapter of Japan. I should have blog posted about this in more detail, but forgot to -- my roommate M moved out last Thursday to England. It's too bad. I'll miss talking about anime and watching him play computer games. And today J came home with exciting news -- he got offered a job. He starts training tomorrow. The next day they will fly him to the opposite coast of Japan for his job. He is a super-sub, meaning he fills in for English high-school teachers on long term basis. If a teacher is needed for a week or a month anywhere in Japan, he is your man. They will pay for his accomadation, wherever. So he will be living as a vagabond for a year. Kind of a cool gig, not my cup of tea, because I want roots. But in any case, he'll probably be gone in 2 days, and then I am left here, alone, in the squalor. But only for a week, and then I am gone to The Good Ol' Country. When I return, I will be somewhere new.
Yes, this first part of Japan was easy. It was too easy, and I didn't try hard. The wheels of fate are turning in synchrony with the eternal clock. Things are moving; people are moving. I am moving; I hope I don't stop until I've learned Japanese.
--Eoin
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Silence is Golden
Crappy week.
Let me start with the minor things. I have no full time employment. I have no future apartment or job.
Let me tell you what is really bothering me. On Saturday I went with the girl from Miami -- N -- to a rock concert. She knew the headlining act, and was obliged to go. Heck, I didn't even really want to go, it just turned out to be the most convenient thing to do. And it was free. So we go, and I see this band whose music I have on my computer b4 hand and who were pretty enjoyable. Then we see a pretty rockin band, then a weird noise band, and finally -- the terrible terrible deathly terrible final act.
Suffice to say, they put on the gig, were pretensious and boring, boring, derivative, and LOUD. At certain points they turned their distortion, pitch, and volume on high. Now we were standing at the front near the speakers so she could be seen by her accquaintences. This noise peirced my eardrums like daggers. I dont remember ever feeling physical pain from sound, but this truly hurt. Then they would ease off and return to their normal wailing, then jam on the pain again in the name of Rock. I longed to be in a Munch painting with my hands over my ears, but couldnt since I was 2 feet away from the singer, and for some stupid reason didn't just leave the floor. In anycase, their set lasted 15-20 minutes and they were done. Afterwards, outside, I asked N if her ears were still ringing. She said no...
Cut forward 115 hours. My right ear has a persistent ring in it. It never goes away. Sometimes it fades from my conciousness, but is always there. It is usually at a constant volume, but sometimes it waxes and wanes ever so slightly. On the train or outside it is easy not to hear it. With music playing it is not too noticible. It isnt even THAT loud. It sounds like a computer monitor or a computer booting up. Its a high pitched, metallic, unnatural squeal. Well, more cold than squeal, lets say a pure tone. Its surprising how unorganic it sounds.
I hoped to give it a few days to clear, right now that is all I can do, but days keep passing and the noise remains. As I said, sometimes when I dont think about it, I dont notice it, but thats kind of like always having a thought in your mind that you know you can't think about. I am talking about this affliction as if its permanent. That is because I fear it is. My symptoms seem consistent with, pardon me while I knock on wood, tinnitus.
There is no cure for tinnitus, although there is treatment. (Some research, though, suggests that you may be able to heal the damage with hyperbaric oxygen treatment, or sessions in a 100% pressurized oxygen container, within a few months of the traumatic injury.) There are also mental training excersizes that you can do. Tinnitus is caused for various reasons, one of which is acoustic trauma. The inner ear hairs become damaged, and the associated nerves start firing off random signals to the brain that correspond to no physical sound.
The ringing is bothersome. But bothersome things are nothing to cry about. What is awful is knowing that for the rest of my life I may be fatigued by this constant, omnipresent irritation. I also presently have fears that it may get worse. Initially I just heard the ringing in my right ear, but going to bed 2 nights ago, I heard a faint ring in my left, and last night, I heard an additional noise (like metallic crickets) in my right... I don't want my ear condition to get any worse. And what is also sad, is that I may not ever hear silence again. I've been pretty depressed this week. It'd be bad enough if this happened at middle or old age. But I'm only 21, and am not looking forward to enduring 60 years of noise. I'm not going clubbing on Friday for my birthday for obvious reasons.
...
"All in all, at least you've got your health."
Eoin
Let me start with the minor things. I have no full time employment. I have no future apartment or job.
Let me tell you what is really bothering me. On Saturday I went with the girl from Miami -- N -- to a rock concert. She knew the headlining act, and was obliged to go. Heck, I didn't even really want to go, it just turned out to be the most convenient thing to do. And it was free. So we go, and I see this band whose music I have on my computer b4 hand and who were pretty enjoyable. Then we see a pretty rockin band, then a weird noise band, and finally -- the terrible terrible deathly terrible final act.
Suffice to say, they put on the gig, were pretensious and boring, boring, derivative, and LOUD. At certain points they turned their distortion, pitch, and volume on high. Now we were standing at the front near the speakers so she could be seen by her accquaintences. This noise peirced my eardrums like daggers. I dont remember ever feeling physical pain from sound, but this truly hurt. Then they would ease off and return to their normal wailing, then jam on the pain again in the name of Rock. I longed to be in a Munch painting with my hands over my ears, but couldnt since I was 2 feet away from the singer, and for some stupid reason didn't just leave the floor. In anycase, their set lasted 15-20 minutes and they were done. Afterwards, outside, I asked N if her ears were still ringing. She said no...
Cut forward 115 hours. My right ear has a persistent ring in it. It never goes away. Sometimes it fades from my conciousness, but is always there. It is usually at a constant volume, but sometimes it waxes and wanes ever so slightly. On the train or outside it is easy not to hear it. With music playing it is not too noticible. It isnt even THAT loud. It sounds like a computer monitor or a computer booting up. Its a high pitched, metallic, unnatural squeal. Well, more cold than squeal, lets say a pure tone. Its surprising how unorganic it sounds.
I hoped to give it a few days to clear, right now that is all I can do, but days keep passing and the noise remains. As I said, sometimes when I dont think about it, I dont notice it, but thats kind of like always having a thought in your mind that you know you can't think about. I am talking about this affliction as if its permanent. That is because I fear it is. My symptoms seem consistent with, pardon me while I knock on wood, tinnitus.
There is no cure for tinnitus, although there is treatment. (Some research, though, suggests that you may be able to heal the damage with hyperbaric oxygen treatment, or sessions in a 100% pressurized oxygen container, within a few months of the traumatic injury.) There are also mental training excersizes that you can do. Tinnitus is caused for various reasons, one of which is acoustic trauma. The inner ear hairs become damaged, and the associated nerves start firing off random signals to the brain that correspond to no physical sound.
The ringing is bothersome. But bothersome things are nothing to cry about. What is awful is knowing that for the rest of my life I may be fatigued by this constant, omnipresent irritation. I also presently have fears that it may get worse. Initially I just heard the ringing in my right ear, but going to bed 2 nights ago, I heard a faint ring in my left, and last night, I heard an additional noise (like metallic crickets) in my right... I don't want my ear condition to get any worse. And what is also sad, is that I may not ever hear silence again. I've been pretty depressed this week. It'd be bad enough if this happened at middle or old age. But I'm only 21, and am not looking forward to enduring 60 years of noise. I'm not going clubbing on Friday for my birthday for obvious reasons.
...
"All in all, at least you've got your health."
Eoin
Monday, November 26, 2007
Boring...
Let's see... this week was pretty boring. I didn't do much.
All I did was go to a modeling gig with J, get my picture taken, walk down the runway, get a t-shirt for payment along with Subway and free drinks, and see a band that I really because after I'm done modeling at this "rock-fashion" show it turns out that the awesome band playing is they, and who incidently I went up to afterward and said "Nirgilis no ongaku ga daisuki desu!"; meet some new people: 1 a 3rd generation Korean born and raised in Japan who has a gaijin/foreigners card like we Westeners do, 2 a Miami raised Japanese girl who half-runs that modeling thing, go out to dinner with her and J, go to the hipster-den Shimokitazawa with J and her, buy some good drinks, talk to some Frenchies, listen to this man DJ (real small lounge about 10 people in there including us) leave with Frenchies and J to Shibuya to go to a club the man is DJing at, have some fun, buy some expensive drinks, dance to techno; find out I didn't get the job I was hoping to get which was actually a sweet job prob, but at the same time find out they were impressed with my interview to consider me for this other job in the suburbs of Tokyo; show up to work 40 minutes late my first day of my part time job which only translated to 5 minutes late to class because until I rechecked my email at 8:00 AM I thought I was supposed to be at the train station at 9:15 AM but was really supposed to be there at 8:15 AM, taught 2 classes of 20-21 year olds, who were amazed at my young age and also my shoe size (it was a fun class, and I deftly stayed in Control as their Master/ Teacher >:) ); went out to lunch and bought what I hoped were dumplings but what turned out to be fist sized joints or at least lumps of slick thick white cartilidge; slept late too much in general, and made up for it today by studying a lot of Japanese, including going to the cafe with J as an excuse to study there and away from the laptop; started a transition from button to Maitake mushrooms, and today bought some already cheap beef at half price and cooked some.
So it was a pretty uneventful week, sorry I don't have more to write about.
Until next time, faithful reader
Excelsior!
All I did was go to a modeling gig with J, get my picture taken, walk down the runway, get a t-shirt for payment along with Subway and free drinks, and see a band that I really because after I'm done modeling at this "rock-fashion" show it turns out that the awesome band playing is they, and who incidently I went up to afterward and said "Nirgilis no ongaku ga daisuki desu!"; meet some new people: 1 a 3rd generation Korean born and raised in Japan who has a gaijin/foreigners card like we Westeners do, 2 a Miami raised Japanese girl who half-runs that modeling thing, go out to dinner with her and J, go to the hipster-den Shimokitazawa with J and her, buy some good drinks, talk to some Frenchies, listen to this man DJ (real small lounge about 10 people in there including us) leave with Frenchies and J to Shibuya to go to a club the man is DJing at, have some fun, buy some expensive drinks, dance to techno; find out I didn't get the job I was hoping to get which was actually a sweet job prob, but at the same time find out they were impressed with my interview to consider me for this other job in the suburbs of Tokyo; show up to work 40 minutes late my first day of my part time job which only translated to 5 minutes late to class because until I rechecked my email at 8:00 AM I thought I was supposed to be at the train station at 9:15 AM but was really supposed to be there at 8:15 AM, taught 2 classes of 20-21 year olds, who were amazed at my young age and also my shoe size (it was a fun class, and I deftly stayed in Control as their Master/ Teacher >:) ); went out to lunch and bought what I hoped were dumplings but what turned out to be fist sized joints or at least lumps of slick thick white cartilidge; slept late too much in general, and made up for it today by studying a lot of Japanese, including going to the cafe with J as an excuse to study there and away from the laptop; started a transition from button to Maitake mushrooms, and today bought some already cheap beef at half price and cooked some.
So it was a pretty uneventful week, sorry I don't have more to write about.
Until next time, faithful reader
Excelsior!
Monday, November 19, 2007
The Return
Kobe. Awesome. "It's a special town. A port town," a lady told me today during my travels. That it is. That it is. So my last full day there was, in some ways, the best one. I only walked between probably 1 square mile all day, but it was raining, and I walked a very circuitous route, so forgive me! But, although I didnt get down to the harbor again, or get around to climbing that rock wall in that gym I saw, I still had a blast.
Basically, all I did was wander around the 2 central areas all day, stopping in various cafes, reading, and drinking coffee. When in Kobe, as the expression goes. In addition, for lunch, I found a place that was reccomended in my guide book for "Japanese food like it was before Japan got rich." The process was simple, the food carefully prepared, and the atmospehere very Japanese. I sat at a picnic type table near some Japanese, picked my order out by pointing at dishes on display, and the whole room was filled with smoking regulars it appeared, busy place.
Eventually, night fell, and it started raining -- not drizzling, raining. It was nice, although I eventually succumbed and bought an umbrella. During the storm which lasted hours, I continued my meandering. I saw a cafe at the top of a central building and made it my mission to go there, but I had to drop some things off first. After that, I found my way back, went up, and had tiramasu and coffee ovelooking Sanomiya area in Kobe.
There really is just too much to describe about Kobe to do it justice. All the little things. The old people dressed like hippies, the clean air, the graffiti at the edge of town, the modern architecture, the American buildings, the cafes, the mountains, the ocean -- all of it add up to a city that I liked alot.
I took a noon train down to Kobe center, and got an 11.30 last train or so back. On the way back down I saw a young guy in his twenties with a shaved head and sunken in eyes. I figured he was sick, perhaps on chemo. And then I realized how easy I have it. I have never struggled for anything in my life. There is alot of suffering and unhappiness in the world. Part of that is intrinsic to who we are. Part of that is based on our circumstances. I am very glad and grateful I have the family and friends I do, (thank you), and the privelege of a certain amount of money and health. Its shocking to think that people my age get sick and die. It makes me feel guilty that if and when I fall on hard times I can count on my family (or hopefully my friends) to back me up. Why do I have it so easy, on all counts? I don't think I really deserve it; I feel that I can only "deserve" it after experiencing hardship, but I must knock on wood now, because no one should ever wish for that sort of hardship.
I got pretty bummed out after seeing the bald boy on the train, but I was in a pretty introspective and excited state to begin with, after the whole Kobe trip. It was also sad to leave a place that I really loved so much. The feeling I am conveying now, two weeks later, does not do justice to the feelings I had while down there. I tried writing them up while in my hostel the last night. But the annoying lady running it said "we are closing the living room now" so I had to leave that and everyone was asleep in my hostel room so I couldn't type in there. Especially because I think I had toast crumbs under important keys that kept crunching...
I woke up with my cell phone alarm at 10.00 and went back to sleep. Half an hour later I woke up with a mild, but slightly persisting earthquake. Remembering the thousands who died 10 or so years ago in a gigantic Kobe earthquake, I got out of bed, and left the hostel.
I didnt mess around. I got a ticket to go home, and left. That's that. Kobe was a good trip. I will be sure to visit again, and I figure if I can get a year long contract anywhere any time soon, I would be sure to consider moving to Kobe after the contract is up for my remaining time in Japan.
**********************************
What else have I been up to? Well, while in Kobe, eating lunch at that very Japanese place, I got a call for an interview at a company that basically distributes native English speakers to schools. The lady sounded enthusiastic and awkward, and before when I called she seemed very friendly and happy that I tried to speak Japanese to her. It was good news. I had an interview for 2 days time (partly why I didnt stick around in Kobe longer.)
I got to the interview an hour early (its about 90 minutes from my house.) And good thing I got early, cuz it took me 30 minutes to find the place, and in Japan u want to show up early (prob everywhere, idk.) So I fill out, or start to fill out, a massively 7 paged questionaire of teaching and job app questions, u can imagine. Then this lady come and interviews me for 20 minutes. Then she sends in another, older lady who interviews me for a while. Then the original lady interviews me for a little bit. Then she goes away. Mind you, during all these breaks, I am struggling to write my autobiography on these 7 sheets. Then she comes back and tells me I have to do a videotaped intro of myself 3-5 minutes long. So i take 2 minutes to look her talking points over, and then go. Of course, I make sure to knock my chair over on the way out. ;) . And we videotape 2 takes, cuz the first one wasnt all that. Then we come back, i finish up writing, and basically a couple more questions, and we're done. Followed by much bowing on all sides.
I thought the interview went pretty well. The job was for an all girls private highschool 90 minutes from Tokyo. Awesome area. Historical, tucked in the mountains, prefectural capital. The highschool is presitigous, and English is important since they have some ties to Canada somehow, (think missionaries founded it.) Out of however many applicants my company had, they gave 4 people's profile to the school. ouly 3 of us, (us), were chosen. (!) .
So today, I make the 3 hour commute to this place, and its far, but its in a very nice, pretty, rural Japanese enclave and is a pretty looking, nicely bustling city. V. nice. I wasnt that enthusiastic about the job before I saw the area, because judging from the interview it seemed like it would be a lot of work and responsibility. Well, luckily, one dood was sick, so it was only me and this Australian dood interviewing for the position. btw, the position is assistant language teacher. I would be teaching alongside a japanese homeroom teacher. dont think id ever be alone with the kids, maybe, but def have more resonsibility than at a public school, where I think I'd essentially be a dictaphone (aka my dream job.)
I think the interview went well. What it consisted of was them calling him in first. me 20 minutes later. about 30 minutes b4 i was given a sheet of paper saying "you are to give a lesson to 15 people, its your first day as their assistant language teacher. introduce yourself and do activites... 10 minutes." So i walk into this room of 12 people, 2 of which are my PEEPS from THE COMPANY! (holler.) I talk about The GOC and Boston for a little bit, and then do an introduction game where we say what we like and dont and all that jazz.
I think the interview went pretty well. We shall see. One negative thing is as we were leaving the school, some school lady went up to the other dood and said, "can I ask you a personal question..." bla bla bla, so that they were askin him about his gf (who lives in this city,) is prob a negative to me. But at the very least, I hope I impressed/ represented for MY PEEPS from THE COMPANY so that they will strongly consider me for the next teaching gig they got. Who knows.
I have a part time job. Easiest interview ever. I showed up. They didnt ask me why I want to work, what I can do, anything like that. It took 30 minutes. Basically instead of asking me if I was qualified they said, "you worked at Nova for a month, you are qualified to teach these tax-college kids English." The only tough question they asked me was if I was reliable as in not looking for full time work, to which I repsonded I was only looking for part time work. :( . I feel bad, they are good people, and the job would be cool, because Id be hanging out with 21-23 year olds and I would prob be able to hang out with them if the situation arose.
*******************
Dang so much to type, so little strength in my fingers. One last thing. On Sat I went to this design festival, which consisted of thousands of art (painting, postcard, mostly,) music, clothes, booths that were just the size I imagine booths are at science conferences, -- 3-5 feet long. It was huge. We spent all day walking around its 2 floors and could have spent much longer. I bought some nice things. I went with my roomate J and C, who, if you remember, and if I mentioned his initial in my previous post, was my comrade in Kobe. He told me about it, we met up, J came, and it was much better than I expected. ALOT of art. Most of it was pop, which in large doses of the banal variety is bad for the soul. But as J told me, pop art is not meant to last, its about now, it looks cool now, and who cares if its crap in 10 years. So that made me appreciate the pop art more. But what I really appreciated was anime-like art. Not neccesarily big glossy eyed caricatures, but ephemeral, colorful, fantastic creations. I noticed how alot of the art seemed anime-inspired to C, and he smartly responded "its not so much inspired, as they are drawing from a common pool of influences. Its all part of one thing, and anime is one part, and so is illustration." I want to know more about this thing that they arise from. That will have to wait till the next art expo prob (cuz this stuff is so obscure it can only be found when 3000 artists get together.) That will be in March I think.
OK, enough type, more talk
holleratchaboi!
Eoin
Basically, all I did was wander around the 2 central areas all day, stopping in various cafes, reading, and drinking coffee. When in Kobe, as the expression goes. In addition, for lunch, I found a place that was reccomended in my guide book for "Japanese food like it was before Japan got rich." The process was simple, the food carefully prepared, and the atmospehere very Japanese. I sat at a picnic type table near some Japanese, picked my order out by pointing at dishes on display, and the whole room was filled with smoking regulars it appeared, busy place.
Eventually, night fell, and it started raining -- not drizzling, raining. It was nice, although I eventually succumbed and bought an umbrella. During the storm which lasted hours, I continued my meandering. I saw a cafe at the top of a central building and made it my mission to go there, but I had to drop some things off first. After that, I found my way back, went up, and had tiramasu and coffee ovelooking Sanomiya area in Kobe.
There really is just too much to describe about Kobe to do it justice. All the little things. The old people dressed like hippies, the clean air, the graffiti at the edge of town, the modern architecture, the American buildings, the cafes, the mountains, the ocean -- all of it add up to a city that I liked alot.
I took a noon train down to Kobe center, and got an 11.30 last train or so back. On the way back down I saw a young guy in his twenties with a shaved head and sunken in eyes. I figured he was sick, perhaps on chemo. And then I realized how easy I have it. I have never struggled for anything in my life. There is alot of suffering and unhappiness in the world. Part of that is intrinsic to who we are. Part of that is based on our circumstances. I am very glad and grateful I have the family and friends I do, (thank you), and the privelege of a certain amount of money and health. Its shocking to think that people my age get sick and die. It makes me feel guilty that if and when I fall on hard times I can count on my family (or hopefully my friends) to back me up. Why do I have it so easy, on all counts? I don't think I really deserve it; I feel that I can only "deserve" it after experiencing hardship, but I must knock on wood now, because no one should ever wish for that sort of hardship.
I got pretty bummed out after seeing the bald boy on the train, but I was in a pretty introspective and excited state to begin with, after the whole Kobe trip. It was also sad to leave a place that I really loved so much. The feeling I am conveying now, two weeks later, does not do justice to the feelings I had while down there. I tried writing them up while in my hostel the last night. But the annoying lady running it said "we are closing the living room now" so I had to leave that and everyone was asleep in my hostel room so I couldn't type in there. Especially because I think I had toast crumbs under important keys that kept crunching...
I woke up with my cell phone alarm at 10.00 and went back to sleep. Half an hour later I woke up with a mild, but slightly persisting earthquake. Remembering the thousands who died 10 or so years ago in a gigantic Kobe earthquake, I got out of bed, and left the hostel.
I didnt mess around. I got a ticket to go home, and left. That's that. Kobe was a good trip. I will be sure to visit again, and I figure if I can get a year long contract anywhere any time soon, I would be sure to consider moving to Kobe after the contract is up for my remaining time in Japan.
**********************************
What else have I been up to? Well, while in Kobe, eating lunch at that very Japanese place, I got a call for an interview at a company that basically distributes native English speakers to schools. The lady sounded enthusiastic and awkward, and before when I called she seemed very friendly and happy that I tried to speak Japanese to her. It was good news. I had an interview for 2 days time (partly why I didnt stick around in Kobe longer.)
I got to the interview an hour early (its about 90 minutes from my house.) And good thing I got early, cuz it took me 30 minutes to find the place, and in Japan u want to show up early (prob everywhere, idk.) So I fill out, or start to fill out, a massively 7 paged questionaire of teaching and job app questions, u can imagine. Then this lady come and interviews me for 20 minutes. Then she sends in another, older lady who interviews me for a while. Then the original lady interviews me for a little bit. Then she goes away. Mind you, during all these breaks, I am struggling to write my autobiography on these 7 sheets. Then she comes back and tells me I have to do a videotaped intro of myself 3-5 minutes long. So i take 2 minutes to look her talking points over, and then go. Of course, I make sure to knock my chair over on the way out. ;) . And we videotape 2 takes, cuz the first one wasnt all that. Then we come back, i finish up writing, and basically a couple more questions, and we're done. Followed by much bowing on all sides.
I thought the interview went pretty well. The job was for an all girls private highschool 90 minutes from Tokyo. Awesome area. Historical, tucked in the mountains, prefectural capital. The highschool is presitigous, and English is important since they have some ties to Canada somehow, (think missionaries founded it.) Out of however many applicants my company had, they gave 4 people's profile to the school. ouly 3 of us, (us), were chosen. (!) .
So today, I make the 3 hour commute to this place, and its far, but its in a very nice, pretty, rural Japanese enclave and is a pretty looking, nicely bustling city. V. nice. I wasnt that enthusiastic about the job before I saw the area, because judging from the interview it seemed like it would be a lot of work and responsibility. Well, luckily, one dood was sick, so it was only me and this Australian dood interviewing for the position. btw, the position is assistant language teacher. I would be teaching alongside a japanese homeroom teacher. dont think id ever be alone with the kids, maybe, but def have more resonsibility than at a public school, where I think I'd essentially be a dictaphone (aka my dream job.)
I think the interview went well. What it consisted of was them calling him in first. me 20 minutes later. about 30 minutes b4 i was given a sheet of paper saying "you are to give a lesson to 15 people, its your first day as their assistant language teacher. introduce yourself and do activites... 10 minutes." So i walk into this room of 12 people, 2 of which are my PEEPS from THE COMPANY! (holler.) I talk about The GOC and Boston for a little bit, and then do an introduction game where we say what we like and dont and all that jazz.
I think the interview went pretty well. We shall see. One negative thing is as we were leaving the school, some school lady went up to the other dood and said, "can I ask you a personal question..." bla bla bla, so that they were askin him about his gf (who lives in this city,) is prob a negative to me. But at the very least, I hope I impressed/ represented for MY PEEPS from THE COMPANY so that they will strongly consider me for the next teaching gig they got. Who knows.
I have a part time job. Easiest interview ever. I showed up. They didnt ask me why I want to work, what I can do, anything like that. It took 30 minutes. Basically instead of asking me if I was qualified they said, "you worked at Nova for a month, you are qualified to teach these tax-college kids English." The only tough question they asked me was if I was reliable as in not looking for full time work, to which I repsonded I was only looking for part time work. :( . I feel bad, they are good people, and the job would be cool, because Id be hanging out with 21-23 year olds and I would prob be able to hang out with them if the situation arose.
*******************
Dang so much to type, so little strength in my fingers. One last thing. On Sat I went to this design festival, which consisted of thousands of art (painting, postcard, mostly,) music, clothes, booths that were just the size I imagine booths are at science conferences, -- 3-5 feet long. It was huge. We spent all day walking around its 2 floors and could have spent much longer. I bought some nice things. I went with my roomate J and C, who, if you remember, and if I mentioned his initial in my previous post, was my comrade in Kobe. He told me about it, we met up, J came, and it was much better than I expected. ALOT of art. Most of it was pop, which in large doses of the banal variety is bad for the soul. But as J told me, pop art is not meant to last, its about now, it looks cool now, and who cares if its crap in 10 years. So that made me appreciate the pop art more. But what I really appreciated was anime-like art. Not neccesarily big glossy eyed caricatures, but ephemeral, colorful, fantastic creations. I noticed how alot of the art seemed anime-inspired to C, and he smartly responded "its not so much inspired, as they are drawing from a common pool of influences. Its all part of one thing, and anime is one part, and so is illustration." I want to know more about this thing that they arise from. That will have to wait till the next art expo prob (cuz this stuff is so obscure it can only be found when 3000 artists get together.) That will be in March I think.
OK, enough type, more talk
holleratchaboi!
Eoin
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