THE GOC AND ME

"We're not in The GOC anymore" -- Wizard of Oz

It has become evident to me that I, like Dorothy, am no longer in The GOC. This is not a bad thing. Well, by all due respects, its a good thing. That's why I left The GOC. So that I would not be in it.

Well, actually I left it so that I would be in Japan. No offense 2 U All.

I have been slowly regaining contact with my GOC comrades. I intentionally have been avoiding that. I value certain members of The GOC as friends, definately. But to instant message them or whatever is to bring my new world closer to my old world. I don't want a blurry distinction. I don't want to live in Japan and have it be like last year. I don't want this to be an extension or a transition. I want this time in Japan to be a cold and hard break from the time before. Of course, I will ultimately keep in contact and do what I gotta do to stay friends, because stuff like that is important to me.

Which brings me to my next point. I've been pretty comfortable here. I live in a nice apartment with TV that I can watch English "24" on. My roommates are cool, and we talk in English. Teaching is easy; I like my colleauges and most of my students. In restaurants or beurocratic offices, I can get by with the Japanese speaking English. The weather feels like early spring. As I told a GOC friend on the phone: "I'm very comfortable...

"...and that's not good." I want an adventure in Japan and what is an adventure without conflict? I had poetic visions of a melancholy existence living in a single apartment trapped in my room with language books and literature, venturing out only to experience the lightning quick world of modern Japan, with necesary repreaves into the serenity of nature. Eventually, I would mellow out into a small circle of internationally-minded Japanese friends, with a few foreigners thrown in for good measure. Sure, that's probably asking alot, but why not? And then my friend told me "Going to Japan is an adventure in and of itself. I've never been outside the country. I'm sure you'll have conflict later." I realized she was right.

In the meantime, I have no freedom to carve out a desirable niche for myself. I am too busy studying physics. The Cribs are coming Oct 25 and I prob won't go see them, having to study instead. However, after November 3, I can hit the ground, and hopefully will start running.

Don't get me wrong. I'm happy and glad I'm here. Moreover, my desire to turn my world upside down does not include a desire to be unemployed. Every day the situation with Nova seems to get bleaker. Japanese staff haven't been paid since sometime in September. And everyone was supposed to be paid today, but a fax came out saying we will have to wait until Friday. Thing is, they did this last month, too, and ended up paying 2 weeks late. Massive amounts of teachers are calling in "sick," in fact, one branch had NO teachers show up on Saturday. The students who came had to take lessons on this video-conferencing tool each branch has. I heard the Area Manager say on the phone "I suppose I'll just stick with it till the bitter end." When the boss of your boss thinks the company is going down the tubes, and says it in front of you... things aren't so good. The ship is sinking, but at my branch its business as usual. No staff has called in sick, and the students and teachers keep having good lessons. Will we survive? I hope so. Will I get a pay check? I hope so. How long will Nova be able to survive with teachers working merely on a hope they will get paid? I don't know.

L8